Eve doesn't need a fair fight. She needs an exploit. I was about to make the greatest mistake known to women: texting my ex Claire. Then Hell invaded New York. So. Mixed bag. Heaven answered with the Blessing, a System that gives survivors classes, levels, skills, and just enough power to die fighting. I got Shapeshifter, which sounded incredible right up until my starting forms were House Cat, Golden Retriever, and Galapagos Tortoise. The Blessing came with a guardian angel, and Hell kindly added a devil. One wants me to survive. The other has excellent branding. Unfortunately for me, my ex made a deal with Hell before I even knew the rules. Unfortunately for everyone else, I am a hacker. Give me a broken System, a bad build, and one deeply unreasonable pheasant, and I will find a way to make it everyone else's problem. If the Apocalypse wants to be a game, fine. I cheat smarter. What to expect: ◈ Moderately crunchy LitRPG ◈ Found Family ◈ Queer characters (with a bisexual disaster MC) ◈ Non-Human/Monster Girl MC (sometimes!) ◈ No Harem/Sexual Content Vol 1 complete! Chapters release m-w-f. +15 Chapters released on Patreon